by sweetestdove
A newlywed couple had only been married for two weeks. The husband,
Although very much in love, couldn't wait to go out on the town and party with his old buddies. So, he said to his new wife,
"Honey, I'll be right back... " "Where are you going, coochy cooh?" asked the wife.
"I'm going to the bar, pretty face. I'm going to have a beer. "
The wife said, "You want a beer, my love?" She opened the door to the refrigerator and showed him 25 different kinds of beer, brands from 12 different countries: Germany, Holland, Japan, India, etc.
The husband didn't know what to do, and the only thing that he could think of saying was, "Yes, loolie loolie...but at the bar...you know...they have frozen glasses..." He didn't get to finish the sentence,
Because the wife interrupted him by saying,
"You want a frozen glass, puppy face ?" She took a huge beer mug out of the freezer, so frozen that she was getting chills just holding it.
The husband, looking a bit pale, said, "Yes, tootsie roll, but at the bar they have those hors d'oeuvres that are really delicious...
She opened the oven and took out 15 dishes of different hors d'oeuvres: chicken wings, pigs in a blanket, mushroom caps, pork strips, etc.
"But sweet honey... At the bar... You know... there's swearing, dirty words and all that ..." "You want dirty words, Cutie pie?...
LISTEN UP, DICKHEAD! DRINK YOUR F**KING BEER IN YOUR GOD-DAMN FROZEN MUG AND EAT YOUR MOTHERF**KING SNACKS, BECAUSE YOU AREN'T GOING NYWHERE! GOT IT, A**HOLE?" ....
And, they lived happily ever after.
by sweetestdove
Christmas is the most magical time of the year-- when miracles happen and dreams come true.
The Meaning of Christmas-->
Far away in Bethlehem, a Baby Boy was born;
Born with neither riches nor with fame,
Yet Wise Men came from all around to bring to Him their gifts,
And peace was felt by all who heard His name.
Angels watched Him as He slept, and gently rocked His bed;
Their voices singing softly in His ear;
His Mother and His Father both gave thanks to God above
For the greatest gift of all, their Son, so dear
They knew His life upon this earth would not be filled with wealth,
They also knew He would encounter strife;
But most of all, they knew that He would be a loving Child,
And teach the love of God throughout His life. 
At Christmas, as we celebrate this Birth of Jesus Christ,
Let's keep in mind the truth of Christmas Day;
For it's not the Christmas wrappings, nor the gifts that lie within,
But our gift of love to others in every way...
All Christmas lovers please comment so that everyone could learn the meaning of Christmas!! Wish you Luck & Success ......
by sweetestdove [1] You can become an engineer if you go to an Engineering college, ******* ******* [4] Find keys in a Key board *******
But don't expect to be a President going to the Presidency College!
[2] Expect a BUS at a BUS Stop, but Don't expect a FOOL at FULLSTOP(.)
[3] A Mechanical engineer becomes a mechanic
Then why not a software engineer become a software?
But do not expect a mother in mother board.
[5] Study anything you want and get a certificate in subject of your studies
But don't expect a death certificate studying "Dying and Death."
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